Chuck Norris tells clocks what time it is.
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A black guy was walking naked on the beach at the nudists.
He's got tattooed on his dick his wife's name WENDY.
Suddenly he sees a white guy with something written on his dick and asks him:
You have written your wife name too?
No, I'm responsible for the tourists.
So when my dick is on erection it reads:"WELCOME TO MIAMI BEACH. HAVE A NICE DAY!"
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Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
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In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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Q: What's the similarity between a woman and dog poop?
A: The older they get, the easier they are to pick up.
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Why did Hitler go to the eye doctor?
Because he can Nazi.
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Always go to other people’s funerals, or they won’t go to yours.
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Two random variables were talking in a bar.
They thought they were being discrete but I heard their chatter continuously.
Husband: Honey, why are you wearing your wedding ring on the wrong finger?
Wife: Because I married the wrong man!
Chuck Norris' favorite game is winning.
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