A woman came to his doctor with a left knee that was shot through.
The doctor asked her: "What does it mean? Why did you shoot accurately your left knee?"
The woman tells him only: "Sorry, but, you doctor, have told me that the heart is located two thumbs under my left breast."
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Chuck Norris doesn't do Burn Down charts, he does Smack Down charts.
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Q: What did Data find when he went into the bathroom stall?
A: Captain's log.
Q: What does an old woman have that a young woman doesn't?
A: A belly button between her boobs.
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To run away from Chuck Norris man invented a car, then to catch them Chuck Norris invented crashes.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he forced his mum to eat her vegetables!
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When raining, Chuck Norris doesn't need an umbrella , he can dodge the rain drops.
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Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy.
"There were no survivors."
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When taking the SAT, write "Chuck Norris" for every answer.
You will score a 1600.
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Why is marriage a three-ring circus?
First the engagement ring, then the wedding ring, then the suffering.