Best jokes ever

Scientists have located the gene for alcoholism. They found it at a party, talking way too loudly.
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More jokes about: alcohol
Chaos reigns within. Reflect, repent, and restart. Order shall return.
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More jokes about: IT
The old woman comes to a gynecologist. He inspects her and says with the surprice: An old woman, you're pregnant! How did you managed at your age...? Oh, those teens. They always asks to tell them everything, then show and give to try...
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More jokes about: life
What do we do with crude oil? Teach it some manners!
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More jokes about: kids
Doc, isn't it harmful to drink a shot before eating? No it's not, if you don't eat too often..
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More jokes about: life
At the Court discussion between judge and villager: So you was propeling surrogate alcohol? Me? No! What do you mean no? You have a device for that... means propeled. Then please judge me also for rape... So you have raped someone also? Well no... but I have a device...
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More jokes about: life
You know how they say if you die in your dream then you will die in real life? In reality, if you dream of death then Chuck Norris will find you and kill you.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: How was your first marriage terminated? A: By death. Q: And by whose death was it terminated?
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More jokes about: marriage, death
Where does the acronym LOTUS come from? Let Only Users Suffer.
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More jokes about: IT
Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I didn’t have. In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole. I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way. I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat I found that I had a fractured skull. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
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More jokes about: old people, phone, car, health, driving