Best jokes ever

Coming home, I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree I didn’t have. In an attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole. I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel and had an accident. I collided with a stationary truck coming the other way. I told the police I was not injured, but on removing my hat I found that I had a fractured skull. I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law, and headed over the embankment.
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More jokes about: old people, phone, car, health, driving
A cop asks a nigger: Can you legitimate yourself? Is this because I’m black?
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What is a baby? "A soft pink thing that makes a lot of noise at one end and has no sense of responsibility at the other."
Vote: has 25.64 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

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What did the green grape say to the purple grape? Breath!!!!
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What do you get if you cross a hippo, elephant and a rhino? A Helephino!!
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Yo momma’s so ugly, when they took her to the beautician it took 12 hours – for a quote!
Vote: has 25.60 % from 125 votes. Send joke:

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My girlfriend used to give amazing blow jobs, but lately they haven't been so great - they are starting to hurt me now since her baby teeth started growing in.
Vote: has 25.54 % from 253 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
I’m a very giving lover – I give Green Shield Stamps.
Vote: has 25.43 % from 41 votes. Send joke:

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Sex is like a motor racing - the most important thing is not to save money for bes quality rubber.
Vote: has 25.31 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

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What's yellow and black and makes you laugh ? A bus full of niggers going over a cliff.
Vote: has 25.31 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, travel, car