The only Christmas present Chuck Norris ever gives is allowing you to live.
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Your mama is so stupid, when she lost her dildo she called the cops to look for it.
How does a gay man fake an orgasm?
He spits on his partners back.
One day, Little Johnny was with his father at home.
He asked: "What does "evolution" mean?"
His father replied, "Figure it out."
Next day, at school, during a math test, a boy raised his hand: "What's 289+308?"
The teacher said: "Figure it out."
Ten minutes later, Little Johnny looked at the boy and said: "Why don't you write "evolution"? Your teacher already told you!"
Yesterday I was at the hairdresser to cut my hair.
The cutting of the hair costs 3 Euros but I had only 1 Euro.
So I have asked the hairdresser if she will cut my hair also for 1 Euro?
She said yes, so I was glad.
Ok, it is not perfect, one side of my head is cut a little bit more than the other one, maybe I look a bit weird, but nobody is perfect.
Chuck Norris fires Donald Trump.
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When Chuck Norris looks in the mirror, he gets jealous.
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The Titanic sunk because Chuck Norris ran into it during his swim.
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You cannot escape the power of Chuck Norris.
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A Chuck Norris round house kick is considered the first "super-collider".
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