Best jokes ever

Two fathers chat outside school in the morning; "Bill, have you solved your son’s math problems?" "Yes, man, I did. Why?" "Can you quickly give them to me, so I can copy them...?"
Vote: has 78.38 % from 212 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: school
Women are like telephones. They love to be held. They love to be talked to. But, if you press the wrong button, you're disconnected.
Vote: has 78.37 % from 299 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women, phone, love
What did the Boston Marathon bombers do that Hitler couldn't? Ended a race.
Vote: has 78.35 % from 133 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, Hitler
Q: What is the difference between northern and southerner fairytales? A: Northerner starts off with "Once upon a time..." a southerner starts with "listen to this shit..."
Vote: has 78.35 % from 319 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist
Since it started to rain, my wife can't stop looking through the window. If it will start pouring down, I'm afraid I will have to let her inside.
Vote: has 78.35 % from 170 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
A woman and her friend are visiting the zoo. They are standing in front of the big silver back gorillas cage when one woman makes a gesture that the gorilla interprets as an invitation. He grabs her, yanks her over the fence, and takes her to his nest in the pen. There he ravishes her and makes passionate love to her for about 2 hours till he is tranquilized, and the lady taken to hospital. Her friend, deeply concerned, visits her the next day. “Are you hurt?” she asks. She replies, “Of course I’m hurt! He hasn’t called! He hasn’t written!”
Vote: has 78.34 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, women, animal, love, hospital
What do you do if an epileptic falls in your pool? Throw in your laundry.
Vote: has 78.34 % from 84 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor
A big dirty farmer walks into his bedroom with a sheep under his arm and says: "This is the pig I have to f*ck when you're not up for s*x." His wife says: "I think you'll find that's a sheep." He says: " I think you'll find I was talking to the sheep!"
Vote: has 78.33 % from 95 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
4 reasons why I curse 1) Because I fucking want to. 2) Because I fucking can. 3) Because I don't give a fuck. 4) Because my mom isn't around.
Vote: has 78.33 % from 354 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty
Yo Momma so stupid, she thought seaweed is something fish smoke.
Vote: has 78.33 % from 359 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, stupid, weed, fish