Q: Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired? A: Because he couldn't keep his calves together!
Q: If an accountant's wife cannot sleep, what does she say? A: "Darling, could you tell me about your work."
Chuck Norris used to date Hurricane Katrina.
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
Chuck Norris once shot down a German fighter plane with his finger, by yelling, "Bang!"
When a Jedi dies they become part of the force, when the force dies it becomes part of Chuck Norris.
Curiosity didn't kill the cat. Chuck Norris did.
Karma believes in Chuck Norris.
A boyfriend asks his girlfriend: "What gift would you like to receive during the St. Valentine's Day?" "Well, I don't know" she answers shyly. "OK, that I give you another year to think about it…"
Cool Morals: 1. Money is not everything. There's also MasterCard & Visa. 2. One should love animals. They are tasty too. 3. Save water. Drink beer. 4. Studying is healthy. So leave it for the sick. 5. Books are holy. So don't touch them. 6. Love your neighbor. But don't get caught. 7. Every one should marry because happiness is not the only thing in life...