Best jokes ever

Two police officers stopped a guy for speeding on the province highway in Mississauga, Ontario. As they were writing up the ticket, one oficer turned to the other and said: "How do you spell Mississauga?" The other one replied: "I don't know." So the first one said: "Well what are we gong to do? If we spell it wrong, it will get dismissed." The second oficer said: "Why don't we just let him go and stop him again when he gets to Toronto?"
Vote:
has 72.97 % from 164 votes. More jokes about: cop
One morning a boy walks in to class late His substitute teacher asks him "Where have you been" He replies "Throwing pebbles at a car" 15 minutes later a girl walks in the teacher asks 'where have you been' she answers "throwing pebbles at a car" 2 hours later a young girl comes in all bruised and dirty the teacher asks "Let me guess you were throwing pebbles at a car" she answers "No miss, I am pebbles"
Vote:
has 72.97 % from 278 votes. More jokes about: car, school, time
Teacher: Your behaviour reminds me of square root of 2? Student: Why? Teacher: Because its’ completely irrational.
Vote:
has 72.97 % from 286 votes. More jokes about: math
I was just told that my dog chased someone on a bicycle and bit him. That's bullshit, my dog can't even ride a bicycle.
Vote:
has 72.96 % from 350 votes. More jokes about: animal, dog
A 6 year old boy asks his daddy: Daddy, where did I come from to this life? You were brought by a stork. That's strange, you have such a pretty wife, but nevertheless you're fucking a stork.
Vote:
has 72.96 % from 298 votes. More jokes about: sex
Black man walked into the bar with a parrot on his shoulder.  The bartender asks, "Where did you get it?"  The parrot says, "Africa…"
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 863 votes. More jokes about: bar, bartender, parrot, racist
Q: Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? A: They already have boyfriends.
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 168 votes. More jokes about: men, relationship
HR manager to job candidate: ‘I see you’ve had no computer training. Although that qualifies you for upper management, it means you’re under-qualified for our entry level positions.’
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: IT, management
FOUR stages of girl & boy relation! 1. hand in hand. 2. that in hand. 3. hand in that. 4. that in that.
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: life
Doctor: "Did you take those pills I gave you to improve your memory?" Patient: "What pills?"
Vote:
has 72.95 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: doctor, drug, memory
<<<283284285286
More jokes →
Page 283 of 1429.