Why did the farmer feed money to his cow? He wanted rich milk.
Drake Bell: In honor of Kim and Kanye's baby "North West" I will be naming my first son "Taco".
A man goes to the doctor and says, "Doctor, there's a piece of lettuce sticking out of my bottom." The doctor asks him to drop his trousers and examines him. The man asks, "Is it serious, doctor?" The doctor replies, "I'm sorry to tell you, but this is just the tip of the iceberg."
Chuck Norris wrote the Assassins creed!
I went to blockbusters last night and asked if I could borrow Batman Forever. The bloke at the counter said, "NO you have to bring it back tomorrow!"
Chuck Norris once rode a bull threw a China shop, the only thing that broke was the bull.
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
There is a way to kill Chuck Norris, it is... Sorry, the person typing this just had his head bashed in by a roundhouse kick.
Cancer gets checked for Chuck Norris.
Q: If a blonde and a brunette were falling off a building, who would hit the ground first? A: The brunette because the blonde would stop for directions.