Q: What type of bees make milk?
A: Boo-bees.
I stopped a girl in the street last night and handed her a rape alarm and some pepper spray.
She looked confused and said, "What are these for?"
I started unbuttoning my jeans and replied, "I like a challenge."
Q: What do you call a gay dinosaur?
A: Megasoreass.
Q: Why didn't the toilet paper cross the road?
A: Cause it got stuck in a crack.
Yo mama so fat I thought of her in my head and I broke my neck.
My New Year's resolution is to stop hanging out with people who ask me about my New Year's resolutions.
Vote:
A chubbier woman: "Mirror, Mirror on the wall, who's the fairest of them all?"
Mirror: "Kindly move aside. I can't see anything."
Q: What is another name for a gynecologist?
A: A private investigator.
Q: What did the lawyer name his daughter?
A: Sue.
Q: And his son?
A: Bill.
A man farts in bed next to his wife.
His wife asks, "What in the world was that?"
He replies, "Touchdown. I'm winning, seven nothing."
She decides to get even, so she lets one loose.
He yells at her, "What was that?"
She replies, "Touchdown, tie score."
He wants to get her back, but he tries so hard he sh*ts in bed.
The wife asks, "Now what in the world was that?"
He replies, "Halftime, switch sides."
Vote: