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Customer: "Waiter, this soup tastes funny." Waiter: "Funny? But then why aren’t you laughing?"
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Chuck Norris can cook minute rice in 30 seconds.
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Q: What does the baker have under his apron? A: Dough nuts.
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yo mama so fat, when she dive into the ocean, there is a tsunami warning out!
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Your mama is such a wh*re, that all the men use her just like a roundabout, everyone take's a turn
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Q: When does a person decide to become an accountant? A: When he realizes he doesn't have the charisma to succeed as an undertaker.
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Justin Bieber was inspired by Usher because of his music and dance, Usher was inspired by Michael Jackson The King of Pop, Michael Jackson was inspired by...Chuck Norris.
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I just watched a squirrel bury a nut in my front yard. I'm going to dig it up and replace it with a Cadbury egg. That'll blow his little mind.
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Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris. The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
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An old man and his wife went to the doctor's office. The doctor asked the man for a blood, urine and feces sample. The man was slightly deaf and said, "What?" The doctor said, "I need a blood, urine and feces sample." The man still looked puzzled, so his wife leaned over and yelled into his ear, "Sheldon, the doctor needs a pair of your underwear."
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