Best jokes ever

Chuck Norris saw the Invisible Man.
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has 66.88 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: How do vampires get around on Halloween? A: On blood vessels.
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has 66.88 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: death, Halloween, travel
I had a visitor one night… he explored my body… licked, sucked, swallowed & had his fill… when satisfied he left… I was hurt… Damn mosquito!!!
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has 66.87 % from 119 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, dirty, sex
What two things in the air can make a woman pregnant? Her feet.
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has 66.87 % from 212 votes. More jokes about: sex
A doctor from the inner city was conversing with an old friend from med school at a cafe when he said, "Man, can I tell you something?" His friend nods. "Sure." "Okay, so the other day I had this one really hot, foreign patient, and I haven't been able to stop thinking about her since..." He goes on to tell his friend everything about her, from her long blond hair and ability to speak fluent French, to her shimmering blue eyes and soft skin. His friend seemed more disgusted with each passing moment. "Dude, that is not cool." The doctor, indignant, defended himself. "What's wrong with that? Lots of doctors are attracted to their patients." His friend simply shook his head and replied, "Maybe, but I guarantee you none of those doctors were pediatricians..."
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has 66.81 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: beauty, black humor, dirty, doctor, friendship
Hey girl, your body reminds me of Mcdonalds, because I'm loving it!
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has 66.81 % from 95 votes. More jokes about: beauty, flirt, food, love
A blonde desserts her home town out of shame, and colors her hair brown. She drives past a farm and sees all the sheep. She goes up to the farmer and ask, "If I guess how many sheep you have can I have one?" The farmer nodded. She continued. "159" The farmer is surprised. "How did you know?" "Lucky guess" She grabs one and gets in her car. The farmer comes up and says, "If I can guess your real hair color can I get my dog back?"
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has 66.81 % from 112 votes. More jokes about: animal, blonde, dog, math, money
Son: I can't go to school today. Father: Why not? Son: I don't feel so well. Father: Where does it hurt? Son: In school.
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: school
Your mama so ugly when god was making light he told her to step out the way.
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: ugly, Yo mama
Little lad is sitting between his Mum and Dad on the sofa and they are playing a game about what sounds animals say. His Mum says "What does a duck say Tommy?" He says"Quack quack Mummy." His Mum says "Very good Tommy,that's right." She says "What does a dog say?" He says "Woof woof Mummy." She says "Very good." She says "What does a cat say?" He says "Meow meow Mummy." She says "Yes that's right." Tommy says "Let Daddy have a go." His dad says "Ok Tommy,what does a cow say?" The little lad looks confused and his Dad says "Come on Tommy you know what a cow says." Tommy says "Yes I do but do you mean a cow that eats grass and gives us our milk, or the one you where talking to Uncle John about, that said you could'nt go to the Stag show with him?"
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has 66.77 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, family, game, insulting
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