Chuck Norris doesn't run out of patience, patience runs out of him from fear of a roundhouse kick to the face.
How do you make a rabbit fast? Don't feed it.
Q: Did you hear the Energizer Bunny Was Arrested? A: Charged With Battery.
When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
Yo' mama so stupid, she walked into an antique shop and asked, "What's new?"
Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
I thought I was at a Nicki Minaj concert for 20 minutes before I realized I was just watching a homeless man yell at a pigeon.
When Chuck Norris got his first sling-shot, he created what we now know today as the "Moon", "Mars", "Jupitar", "Saturn" and "Pluto"
A lady opened her refrigerator and saw a rabbit sitting on one of the shelves, "What are you doing in there?" she asked. The rabbit replied, "This is a Westinghouse, isn't it?" The lady confirmed, "Yes." "Well," the rabbit said, "I'm westing."
I challenged Chuck Norris once. He made a bun with my legs over my head, then he roundhouse kicked me to outer space. Now I read the facts from Mars.