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I bet my friend $5 that he would drown in the lake. A bittersweet victory.
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More jokes about: black humor, money
After a long labour, a doctor approaches the new mother and says, "Ma'am, I've got some good news, and some bad news. What would you like?" After quickly thinking it over, she responds, "I'll have the bad news first doctor". The doctor replies, "We'll, I'm not sure how to put this, and I'm sorry to have to tell you, your child has red hair". Relieved, a smile spreads across the mother face. "Doctor, if that's the bad news, what's the good news". The doctor replies, "He's dead".
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More jokes about: black humor, doctor, ginger, death
Q: What do Democrats and porn stars have in common? A: They are experts in switching positions in front of a camera.
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More jokes about: democrat, sex
Yo' Mama is so old, she dreams in black and white.
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More jokes about: Yo mama, age, insulting, technology
Yo Momma is so hairy, that Bigfoot tried to take her picture!
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Yo Momma's so fat when she takes a bath she fills the tub then turns on the water.
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More jokes about: Yo mama, fat, insulting
A rather obese man is very excited about his new job and wants to start work immediately. However, when he sits down at his computer, the only program installed was spreadsheets. Confused, the man calls over his boss and asks:"Why there is only excel installed on this computer?" His boss replies, "It was the only program in your size!"
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More jokes about: fat, IT, work
John was in trouble, really big trouble. You see, he forgot his wedding anniversary and, if you're married, you can imagine what he's probably going through. His wife was really pissed. She told him "Tomorrow morning, I expect to find a gift in the driveway that goes from 0 to 200 in 6 seconds AND IT BETTER BE THERE!" She was serious too, so John got serious. The next morning he woke up early and left for work. When his wife woke up, she looked out the window and sure enough there was a box gift-wrapped, right there in the middle of the driveway. Confused, the wife threw her robe on and ran out to the driveway, brought the box back in the house and opened in with much anticipation. Inside she found a brand new bathroom scale. John has been missing since Thursday.
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More jokes about: men
Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked someone so hard that his foot broke the speed of light, went back in time, and killed Amelia Earhart while she was flying over thePacific Ocean.
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Your momma is so fat that her measurements are 26-34-28, and her other arm is just as big!
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More jokes about: Yo mama, fat