Best jokes ever

What do you call a show full of lions? The mane event.
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A little guy gets on a plane and sits next to the window. A few minutes later, a big, heavy, strong, mean-looking, hulking guy plops down in the seat next to him and immediately falls asleep.  The little guy starts to feel a little airsick, but he's afraid to wake the big guy up to ask if he can go to the toilet. He knows he can't climb over him, and so the little guy is sitting there, looking at the big guy, trying to decide what to do. Suddenly, the plane hits an air pocket and an uncontrollable wave of nausea passes through the little guy. He can't hold it in any longer and he pukes all over the big guy's chest. About five minutes later the big guy wakes up, looks down, and sees the vomit all over him. "So," says the little guy, "are you feeling better now?"
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Did you hear about the wild party at the haunted house? The whole vibe was anything ghost.
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More jokes about: Halloween, party
Count Dracula once bit Chuck Norris and immediately turned vegetarian.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, Chuck Norris
Why did the tomato turn red? Because he saw the salad dressing.
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More jokes about: food
The doctor stood by the bedside of a very sick patient and said, “I cannot hide the fact that your are very ill, my man. Is there any one you would like to see?”. “Yes,” replied the patient faintly, “Another doctor”.
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More jokes about: life, health, doctor
Charlie Sheen winning? Chuck Norris says "I think not."
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, celebrity
The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
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If you click on start, run, then type in Chuck Norris you will get a permanent blue screen of death.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer
In the game 'Spore', The Grox are a result of Chuck Norris being allowed to create a species, but they had to be weakened to make the game possible.
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, game