After a really good party a man walks into a bar and orders a drink.
Already drunk and delirious, the man turns to the person sitting next to him and says, "You wanna hear a blonde joke?"
The person replies, "I am 240 pounds, world kickboxing champion and a natural blonde. My friend is 190 pounds, world judo champion and is a natural blonde. And my other friend is 200 pounds, world arm wrestling champion and is also a natural blonde. Do you still want to tell me that blonde joke?"
The man thinks for a while and replies, "Not if I have to explain it three times."
Chuck Norris is so fast that when he runs, he can see his back.
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James Bond's license to kill was approved by Chuck Norris.
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Thunder is caused by Chuck Norris rubbing the stubble on his chin.
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Gee, that's a nice set of legs, what time do they open?
What is a nigger?
Proof that skunks fuck monkeys.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
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A gypsy man buys land next to the house of a doctor.
He hires an engineer and then gets him build an identical house.
When he finished the house, the gypsy man comes to the balcony and shouts the doctor.
"Doctor – Doctor!"
"What is you gypsy eh?"
The doctor says. "Well, maybe you don’t like me but we are the same because we have the same house!"
"No way, the doctor says, because we do not have the same furniture..." the gypsy man angry as he is, oders the same furniture and he comes to the balcony again.
"Doctor – Doctor! We have the same house, the same furniture, we are the same ourselves!"
"What are you saying you stupid gypsy do we have the same car?" the doctor says. and shows at his luxurious MERCEDES in the garage.
Angrier the gypsy man gets loans and buy an identical MERCEDES and goes back to the balcony.
"Doctor – Doctor!"
"What do you want again eh?" doctor says
"I am “better” than you!"
"Why is that eh?" doctor says.
"We own the same house, furniture and same car, right?" The gypsy says.
"I agree, but do these make you better than me?" the doctor says.
"Because I have a neighbor doctor, and you have a neighbor Gypsy!Ha!"
What do you call a snake that is exactly 3.14 meters long?
A πthon.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, her farts are classified as biological weapons.