Best jokes ever

Question: What’s the ideal breakfast setting? Answer: You’re sitting at the kitchen table and your son is on the cover of the Wheaties box, your mistress is on the cover of Playboy, and your wife is on the back of a milk carton.
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women, food, wife
A sexy woman walks up to the counter and motions the bartender over. She starts to run her fingers through his hair and asks to speak to the manager. The Bartender replies, "Sorry, the manager is out. Can I help you?" By this time the woman has run her fingers over his face and in his mouth where the horny bartender is gently sucking on them. She says, "You sure he isn’t here?" The bartender mumbles through her fingers, "Yes, he’s out for another 2 hours. Are you sure there is nothing I can do to help?" The woman then says, "Oh, I only wanted to tell him there’s no toilet paper or soap in the ladies toilets!"
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: women
The old man had died. A wonderful funeral was in progress and the country preacher talked at length of the good traits of the deceased, what an honest man he was, and what a loving husband and kind father he was. Finally, the widow leaned over and whispered to one of her children, "Go up there and take a look in the coffin and make sure that's your pa in there."
Vote: has 63.22 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, death, fish, cat, funeral
Q: Why don't witches wear underwear? A: For a better grip on there broomstick!
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More jokes about: dirty
Q: What do a priest and a Christmas tree have in common? A: They both have balls just for decoration.
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More jokes about: dirty, priest, Christmas
Mary's father has 5 daughters, 1. Nana 2. Nono 3. Nini 4. Nene What is the fifth daughters name?
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More jokes about: life, dad, kids
When is the only time you smile and wink at a nigger? When you are looking through the scope on your rifle.
Vote: has 63.17 % from 723 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people
A cop pulls a guy over for weaving across two lanes of traffic. He walks up to the drivers window and asks, "You drinkin'?" The driver said, "You buyin'?"
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More jokes about: cop
What did the fish say when it swam into a wall? Dam.
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More jokes about: animal, fish
Latecomer: Am I too late for the bonfire? Host: No jump up there on the sticks, there is room next to that Guy.
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More jokes about: black humor