Anyone remember the good old days before Facebook, Instagram and Twitter? When you had to take a photo of your dinner, then get the film developed, then go around to all your friends' houses to show them the picture of your dinner? No? Me neither.
Why are faggots so generous? Because they don't know how to be tight arsed!
A mathematician is a blind man in a dark room looking for a black cat which isn't there.
A man went to the Police Station wishing to speak with the burglar who had broken into his house the night before. "You'll get your chance in court." said the Desk Sergeant. "No, no no!" said the man. "I want to know how he got into the house without waking my wife. I've been trying to do that for years!"
A couple celebrates their 30th anniversary by re-walking their first walk together. They come to the fence against which they first made love. The husband says, "Come on, for old time's sake." The wife agrees and they both undress. Afterwards, the husband says, "You're even better than you were 30 years ago." His wife replies, "That fence wasn't electrified 30 years ago!"
What is the geographical definition of s*x? Ans: It is an action done by the polland in the holland between the thailand with the little help of greece.
Q: Why can't scientists find a cure for AIDS? A: They can't get the laboratory mice to arse f*ck.
A kid came home from school and asked his dad, "Dad, I heard some kids talking about a thing called a vagina. What is a vagina, and what does it look like?" "Well, son, before sex it looks like a beautiful unopened rose." "Wow, what does it look like after sex?" "Well, son, have you ever seen a bulldog eating mayonaise?"
Snow. One of the rare times the phrase "8 - 12 inches" is associated with something white.
Q: Why did the Avon lady walk funny? A: Her lipstick.