Why don't whales eat sushi very often?
Of course whales like sushi.
It's just those itty-bitty chop sticks that keep getting stuck in their teeth.
If Chuck Norris were a toy, you wouldn't play with him, he'll play with you.
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Did you hear about the horse with the negative altitude?
He always said "Neigh"
Champions eat Wheaties for breakfast.
Chuck Norris eats Champions for breakfast.
Big Brother isn't watching you.
Chuck Norris is watching you!
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Chuck Norris boils an egg by holding it.
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Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
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First cannibal: "I can't find anything to eat!"
Second cannibal: "But the jungle's full of people."
First cannibal: "Yes, but they're all very unsavory."
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Before sliced bread, people used to say "That's the greatest thing since Chuck Norris".
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Q: Why do hurricanes travel so fast?
A: Because if they travelled slowly, we'd have to call them slow-i-canes.