Why don't blondes eat bananas? They can't find the zipper.
What did Obi Wan say when Luke was constipated? "Use the F-O-R-C-E Luke!"
A blonde walked into a gas station and said to the manager, "I locked my keys in my car. Do you have a coat hanger or something I can stick through the window to unlock the door?" "Why sure," said the manager, "We have something that works especially well for that." A couple minutes later, the manager walked outside to see how the blonde was doing and he heard another voice. "No, no! A little to the left," said the other blonde inside the car.
Yo mama so skinny... She turned sideways and dissapeared
What do you call a bear with no teeth? (A gummy bear!)
A policeman pulled a blonde over after she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Cop: Do you know where you were going? Blonde: No, but wherever it is, it must be bad because all the cars were leaving.
Yo' Mama is so stupid, she tried to put the leftover orange juice back in the rind.
One day, a guy walks out from a shop to see someone PISSING on his Ferrari. "Hey," says the man. "Why are you pissing on my Ferrari?" "Because I feel like it." "Tell you what -- I won't report you to the police if you can keep up with my Ferrari." "Whatever." So the guy gets in his car and drives off, going faster and faster, until he's hit 100 miles per hour. Amazingly, the guy is still keeping up. "I'm amazed," says the driver. "How are you keeping up?" "It's easy," says the running man, "when your d**k is stuck in the door."
How do men exercise on the beach? By sucking in their stomachs every time they see a bikini.
Yo' Mama is so fat, she got stuck in the great outdoors.