Yo' Mama is so stupid, she's as useless as a screen door on a submarine.
Chuck Norris is so tough, that he doesn't get a workout from the weights,they get a workout from him.
Yo mama's so technologically unsavvy, she leaves out pieces of cheese next to the computer!
Yo' mama so poor, she fills her ice trays with toilet water!
A blonde, a brunette and a redhead go on holiday to a tropical island. The brunette takes a beach umbrella, the redhead takes a crate of suntan oil, and the blonde takes a car door. ‘What are you doing with a car door?’ asks the redhead. The blonde replies, ‘If it gets too hot, we can roll the window down.’
Men are like... Chocolate Bars. Sweet, smooth, and they usually head right for your hips.
Men are like.....Coffee The best ones are rich, warm, and can keep you up all night long.
Yo' Mama is so poor, her tv only has two channels: on and not working.
A squad car driver was covering a quiet beat out in the sticks when he was amazed to find a former lieutenant on the police force covering the beat. He stopped the car and asked, "Why, Irish Mike, this wouldn't be your new beat out here in the sticks, would it?" "That it is, "Irish Mike replied grimly, "ever since I arrested the judge on his way to the masquerade ball." "You mean you pinched his honor?" asked Pat. "How was I to know that his convict suit was only a costume?" demanded Mike. "Well," mused Pat, "there's a lesson in this somewhere." "That there is," replied Irish Mike...." 'Tis wise never to book a judge by his cover."
Yo' Mama is so fat, when she did a cartwheel, she kicked an angel in the nuts.