A policeman pulled a blonde over after she'd been driving the wrong way on a one-way street. Cop: "Do you know where your going?" Blonde: "No, but wherever it is, it must be bad 'cause all the people are leaving.
Q: What does a blonde do when it gets cold? A: Sits around a candle Q: What does she do when it gets really cold? A: Lights it
An old woman goes to the doctor's office. The doctor gives her a checkup and says, "I need to do stool, blood and urine tests." The woman says, "Well can I just leave my underwear? Bingo starts in half an hour."
Chuck Norris was in all the Star Wars movies, he played the force.
Yo Mama is like a refrigerator. Meat goes in and out all day.
Yo mama's so fat, when I finished having sex with her and tried to roll off, I was still on her.
Yo' Mama is so old, she has sour cream in her boobs.
Yo' Mama is so fat, she couldn't identify a picture of her feet.
What do you call an abortion in Czechslovakia? A cancelled Czech!
Why did the blonde put lipstick on her forehead? Because she was trying to make up her mind.