Chuck Norris told his iPhone 2g it was a iPhone 4. He can now multi task and use face time.
The organizers of the concert complain to the conductor of a choir: You were supposed to bring a mixed choir, but I can see only men here. But it is a mixed choir – half of them know how to sing, and the other half- do not.
Do you know why your mother is called Egypt? Because every time she shits she leaves a pyramid...
Your mama's teeth are so messed up....i thought her tongue was in jail!
Yo momma is so short she poses for trophies!
What sits in the kitchen and keeps getting smaller and smaller? A baby combing it's hair with a potato peeler!
Good: Your daughter has got a new job. Bad: As a call girl. Ugly: Your co-workers are her best clients. Very ugly: She makes more money than you.
Q: What do you throw to a drowning black man? A: The rest of his family.
What should you do if your girlfriend starts smoking? Slow down. And possibly use a lubricant.
Q:Why is the number eight afraid of the number seven? A:Because seven ate nine.