There is a Navy guy and a Marine in the washroom.
The Marine goes to leave without washing up.
The sailor catches up with him later and says, "In the Navy, they teach us to wash our hands."
The Marine replies, "In the Marines, they teach us not to pee on ours!"
Q: What do you call a dinosaur with no eyes?
A: Doyouthinkysaraus.
Vote:
Chuck Norris grabs Donald Trump by the pussy.
Vote:
Why should you never fart in an apple store?
They don't have Windows!
Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer.
This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
Vote:
The chicken and the egg are laying in bed.
The chicken is smoking a cigarette with a satisfied smile on its face while the egg is frowning and looking slightly annoyed.
The egg mutters "Well I guess that answers that riddle".
What happened when the chef got his hand caught in the dishwasher?
They both got fired.
Yo momma so fat when she Bungie jumps she goes straight to hell.
I fell in love with my wife at second sight.
The first time I didn’t know she had money.
How do Chinese people name their kids?
Throw a spoon down the stairs.
CHING CHANG CHONG TING.