Best jokes ever

A famous boxer must be operated by appendicitis. From the operation room the doctor gets out holding himself to the walls with a bruised eye and says: A can’t do this anymore! I try to anesthetize him, I count until 9 and he gets up and starts punching me...
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, doctor
There where two snakes talking. The 1st one said 'Sidney, are we the type of snakes who wrap ourselves around our prey and squeeze and crush until they're dead? Or are we the type of snake who ambush our prey and bite them and they are poisioned?'. Then the second Snake says "Why do you ask?" The 1st one replies: "I just bit my lip!"
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
After years of scrimping and saving, a husband told his wife the good news: "Honey, we've finally got enough money to buy what we started saving for in 1979." "You mean a brand-new Cadillac?" she asked eagerly. "No," said the husband, "a 1979 Cadillac."
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money, husband, wife
Yo momma’s so ugly, when she looks in the mirror her reflection ducks.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama
Do I have any chance to win? Asks the boxer. Off course! Continue hitting the air and the adversary will shortly get a lung inflammation.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport
How do you know when a crab is drunk? It walks forwards.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, drunk
Yo mama so fat when god said let there be light she was told to move out of the way.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, fat, god
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, parrot
Yo momma’s so ugly, when she walks in the kitchen, the rats jump on the table and start screaming.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama
Chuck Norris has 12 moons. One of those moons is the Earth.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris