The best animal jokes

Waiter: "I’ve stewed liver, boiled tongue and frog’s leg." Customer: "Don’t tell me your problems. Give the menu card."
Vote: has 48.02 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, animal
How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it.
Vote: has 48.02 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, animal, elephant, marriage
Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back? They re always switching their tails.
Vote: has 47.37 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
A husband and wife are eating soup. The wife spills soup all over her and says: "Oh no, I look like a pig" "Yes and you also have soup all over you!"
Vote: has 47.21 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: marriage, wife, husband, food, animal
Little Johnny: „Mom, can I get a dog at Christmas, please?"  Mother: „No, you'll be getting turkey, like every year!"
Vote: has 46.90 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: little Johnny, dog, animal, Christmas, food
What’s the difference between a black and a white bull? The white bull does: “Mooo”. The black bull does: “Hey man, Mooo, man!”
Vote: has 46.76 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, animal
Little girl: "Why does your son say, 'Cluck, cluck, cluck?'" Mother: "Because he thinks he's a chicken." Little girl: "Why don't you tell him he's not a chicken?" Mother: "Because we need the eggs."
Vote: has 46.60 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, family, kids, baby, food
Q: What is it called when a soldier slips into a fox hole? A: Bestiality
Vote: has 46.60 % from 31 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: military, animal
The mouse and the elephant pas together over a bridge, very proud the mouse says: Do you hear how the bridge vibrates under OUR footsteps?
Vote: has 46.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, elephant
While sports fishing off the Florida coast, a tourist capsized his boat. He could swim, but his fear of alligators kept him clinging to the overturned craft. Spotting and old beachcomber standing on the shore, the tourist shouted,"Are there any gators around here?!" "Naw," the man hollered back, "they ain't been around for years!" "Feeling safe, the tourist started swimming leisurely toward the shore. About halfway there he asked the guy,"How'd you get rid of the gators?" "We didn't do nothin'," the beachcomber said. "The sharks got 'em."
Vote: has 46.20 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, fish, animal