When is a lion not a lion?
When he turns into his cage.
According to leading scientists, the deadliest animal on the planet is the Bearded Norris.
Vote:
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle?
It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
Q: What do women and cats have in common?
A: Pussy farts.
I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman…
“Mr Cook?”
“Yes,” I replied.
“I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.”
I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
What do cows wear when they are on vacation in Hawaii?
Moo moos.
What must a policeman have before searching a rabbits home?
A search warren.
What do you get if you cross a kangaroo and sheep?
A wooly jumper.
What do you call a chicken that crosses the road without looking both ways?
"Dead."
Why did the frog go to the mall?
Because he wanted to go hopping.