The best animal jokes

A man and a woman were on a nude beach when a wasp flew into the woman's vagina. In a rush the guy pulled on his shorts, wrapped a towel around the woman, and ran to the hospital. When they got there the doctor said, "The only way I can think to get the wasp out is to slather some honey on my penis and lure it out." The doctor then offered his services for a mere $50. After a long pause, the couple agreed. The doctor happily slathered on some honey and went in. After a couple of thrusts the husband said, "Hey, what the hell is going on?" The doctor says, "Change of plans I'm going to drown the bastard."
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has 56.76 % from 205 votes. More jokes about: animal, dirty, doctor, marriage, sex
How do you turn a fox into an elephant? Marry it.
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has 56.50 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal, elephant, marriage
What do you call a dinosaur with an extensive vocabulary? A thesaurus.
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has 56.50 % from 50 votes. More jokes about: animal
"Why cant you play cards in the jungle?" "Because theres to many cheetahs."
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has 56.42 % from 63 votes. More jokes about: animal, game
What are cows favorite party games? MOO-sical chairs.
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has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, game, music
Q: Why did the bowlegged cowboy get fired? A: Because he couldn't keep his calves together!
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has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal, cowboy
What do you call an owl magician? HOOOOOdini.
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has 56.36 % from 31 votes. More jokes about: animal
Teacher: "What does a duck say?" Jenny: "Quack Quack" Teacher: "What does a cow say?" Madison: "Moo" Teacher: "What does a pig say?" Little Johnny: "A pig says *holds up gun* get on the wall, you motherfucker!"
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has 56.06 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: animal, communication, kids, little Johnny, vulgar
A summer visitor asked the farmer how long cows should be milked. "Oh, I reckon about the same as short ones!" the farmer answered.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris invented the Giraffe when he roundhouse kicked a spotted Horse in the chin.
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has 56.05 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris
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