The best animal jokes

Yo' Mama is so ugly, her face looks like a horse's ass flapping in the breeze.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, ugly, animal, insulting
Q: What's the difference between Yo' Mama and a hippo? A: One has a big mouth and a fat ass. The other lives in rivers in tropical countries.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, fat, animal
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, animal
One day the zookeeper noticed that the Orangutan was reading two books - the Bible and Darwin's Origin of Species. In surprise he asked the ape, "Why are you reading both those books"? "Well," said the Orangutan, "I just wanted to know if I was my brother's keeper or my keeper's brother."
Vote: has 54.16 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, bible
Q: Why can't scientists find a cure for AIDS? A: They can't get the laboratory mice to arse f*ck.
Vote: has 53.62 % from 34 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, science, health, animal, sex
"Why cant you play cards in the jungle?" "Because theres to many cheetahs."
Vote: has 53.58 % from 44 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, game
One day Kermit the Frog was looking sad. Fozzie Bear went up to him and asked what was wrong. Kermit said, "I'm having problems with Miss Piggy." "Like what?" asked Fozzie. "Well, Piggy wants me to eat her out and I can't." Fozzie asked, "So, what's wrong with that? You're not a prude or anything." "No," sighed Kermit, "but I am a Jew."
Vote: has 53.35 % from 56 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, animal, jewish
What do you call an owl magician? HOOOOOdini.
Vote: has 53.18 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
What’s the difference between cats and dogs? Dogs have owners, cats have staff.
Vote: has 52.93 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal
Chuck Norris likes his meat rare, so he eats unicorns.
Vote: has 52.93 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, food, animal