Mummy, mummy, why is daddy swaying in the backyard?
Shut up, and give me more bullets.
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Daughter: "That's it! I'll mary Arthur!"
Mother: "But he is a lazy guy and heavy-drinker!"
Father: "But you have to start with something!"
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Me and my wife decided that we don't want to have children anymore.
So anybody who wants one can leave us their phone number and address and we will bring you one.
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Q: What's more offensive than a truck full of dead babies?
A: Taking them out with pitchforks.
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Q: What's a terrorists favorite American football team?
A: The New York Jets.
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Hitler: I asked for a glass of juice, not gas the Jews!
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Q: Whats worse then a barrel of dead babies?
A: There is one at the bottom that is still alive.
Q: Whats worse then that?
A: He has to eat his way out.
Q: Whats worse then that?
A: He goes back for more.
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What happened when the cannibal bit off a missionary's ear?
He had his first taste of Christianity!
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How do you know Charles Sweeney was dyslexic?
He wanted to order the flaming saganagi, but he accidentally ordered a flaming Nagasaki.
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What's the difference between a police officer and a bullet?
When a bullet kills someone else, you know it's been fired.
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