Did you hear what the blonde who was opening a new bar said when her lawyer explained to her that she needed a liquor license? "Oh, it's not gonna be THAT kind of a bar. That's disgusting!"
What did the blonde say when she found out that she was pregnant? I hope it's not mine.
Q: What do you get when you find a dead blonde in a closet? A: The hide and seek champion of 1996.
There was a competition between a team of blondes and a team of brunettes to see who could catch the most fish icefishing. Once the contest started, it was clear that the brunettes were going to win...they kept pulling out fish after fish. Soon, the blondes got worried and sent over one of their team to see what the brunettes were doing differently. A few minutes later, the blonde comes running back. "A hole! You need to put a hole in the ice!"
There was a blonde who was sitting next to a lawyer on an airplane. The lawyer was naturally bored, so he kept bugging the blonde to play a game of intelligence with him. The blonde was reluctant, so the lawyer offered her 10 to 1 odds. He told her that every time she could not answer his question, she owed him $5, but every time he could not answer hers, he'd give her $50. The lawyer figured the blonde was so dumb, he could not lose, and the blonde thought for a few minutes and reluctantly accepted to play his game. The lawyer fires his first question "What is the distance between the Earth and the nearest star?" Without saying a word the blonde handed him $5. The blonde then asked the lawyer "What goes up a hill with 3 legs and comes back down the hill with 4 legs?" The lawyer's face looked extremely puzzled. He spent several hours, looking up everything he could on his laptop and even placing numerous air-to-ground phone calls trying to figure out the answer. Finally, the angry and frustrated lawyer handed the blonde $50.00. The blonde put the $50 into her purse quickly without saying a word. The lawyer was outraged at this point and asked, "Well, what is answer?" The blonde glanced at him with a smirk on her face and handed him a $5 bill.
Q: How many blondes does it take to change a lightbulb? A: One hundred: one to hold the lightbulb, the other 99 to rotate the house.
One day 2 blondes walked into a tanning salon. One blonde said, " A tan for 2 please!" The cashier said, " Ok," filled out a form for them and asked, "are you two sisters?" They chuckled and replied, " No, we aren't even Catholic."
Q: Did you hear about the blonde who shot an arrow into the air? A: She missed.
So I asked a blonde, "Which is closer, Florida or the Sun?" She said, "The Sun, because I can look up and see it.
Why did the Blonde pee in the Grocery Store? The sign said "Wet Floor."