A blonde takes her typewriter to the doctor. "Doc, I'm afraid my typewriter is pregnant." The doctor asks, "Why in the world would you think that?" She says, "Because it's started missing its period."
Q: Why didn't the blonde want a window seat on the plane? A: She'd just blow dried her hair and she didn't want it blown around too much.
Three blondes were walking through the forest when they came upon a set of tracks. The first blonde said, “Those are deer tracks.” The second blonde said, “No those are elk tracks.” The third blonde said, “You’re both wrong, those are moose tracks.” The blondes were still arguing when the train hit them. Emma: So, what kind of tracks were they?
Q: Why are two blonde girls fighting on a motorcycle? A: They are fighting because they both want to sit next to the window.
A blonde walks into a electronic store and asks the manager, “Can I buy that TV” “No” “Why not?” “Because your a blonde.” So the blonde goes out and dyes her hair red. She returned to the electronic store and said, “Can I buy that TV?” “No” “Why not?” “Your a blonde.” So the blonde goes and shaves her hair off and returns to the electronic store and says, “Can I buy that TV?” “No” “Why not?” “You’re a blonde” “How can you tell I’m a blonde, I dyed my hair red, then shaved it off!” “Because that’s not a TV, that’s a microwave!”
Q: What does a blonde say when you blow in her ear? A: "Thanks for the refill!"
A brunette, a red-head and a blonde were in jail when they decided to break out. The girls broke out and the brunette said, "Let's hide in that barn, they'll never find us." So they climed up the ladder and then the blonde threw it down. The next morning, the cops said, "Come out with your hands in the air!" The red-head said, "Hide in those baskets, they'll never find us!" So the Brunette got in the first one, the red-head got in the second one and the blonde got in the third one. Meanwhile, the cops were getting a ladder set up and trying to get up there. Once they got up, the seargent ordered them to kick the baskets. So the cop kicked the first one: "RUFF." "It's just a damn dog!" yelled the cop. The cop kicked the next one: "MEOW." "It's just a damn cat," yelled the cop. The cop kicked the next basket and the blonde yelled, "POTATOES!
What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? I wonder if it's mine.
A cop pulls over a blonde for speeding. The cop gets out of his car and asks the blonde for her license. "You cops should get it together. One day you take away my license, and the next day you ask me to show it."
Why don't blondes like making Kool-Aid? Because they can't fit eight cups of water in the little packet.