The best celebrity jokes

Superman and The Flash have a race around the world. Who wins? Chuck Norris.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, celebrity, game
Leonardo DiCaprio had to ask permission from Chuck Norris to say the famous line "I'm the king of the world."
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More jokes about: Chuck Norris, celebrity
How come there aren't that many jokes about Jim Jones? The punchlines are too long.
Vote: has 69.96 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: celebrity, mean
Chuck Norris and Justin Bieber once had a singing contest, the loser had to never hit puberty.
Vote: has 69.93 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, music, celebrity
Grandma: "Why is that dumb piece of cotton candy talking." Me: "Grandma, thats Nikki Minaj."
Vote: has 69.86 % from 26 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, celebrity
What does a black person and Batman have in common? They both can't leave home without Robbin.
Vote: has 69.85 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, black people, celebrity
A young boy went up to his father and asked him, "Dad, what is the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The father thought for a moment, then answered, "Go ask your mother if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Then ask your sister if she would sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars, and then, ask your brother if he’d sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars. Come back and tell me what you learn from that." So the boy went to his mother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The mother replied, "Of course, I would! We could really use that money to fix up the house and send you kids to a great university!" The boy then went to his sister and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" The girl replied, "Oh, good heavens! I LOVE Brad Pitt and I would sleep with him in a heartbeat. Are you nuts?" The boy then went to his brother and asked, "Would you sleep with Brad Pitt for a million dollars?" "Of course," the brother replied. "Do you know how much a million bucks would buy?" The boy pondered the answers for a few days and then went back to his dad. His father asked him, "Did you find out the difference between 'potentially' and 'realistically'?" The boy replied, "Yes, 'Potentially', you and I are sitting on three million dollars, but 'realistically', we’re living with two h***s and a future congressman."
Vote: has 69.55 % from 30 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: kids, dad, money, celebrity, school
This guy walks into a bar on the top of a very tall building. He sits down, orders a huge beer, chugs it, walks over to the window, and jumps out. Five minutes later, the guy walks into the bar again, orders another huge beer, chugs it, walks over to the window, and jumps out again. Five minutes later, he re-appears and repeats the whole thing. One hour later, another guy at the bar stops the first guy and says: "Hey, how the heck are you doing that?!" The first guy responds: "Oh, it's really simple physics. When you chug the beer, it makes you all warm inside and since warm air rises, if you just hold your breath you become lighter than air and float down to the sidewalk." "WOW!", exclaims the second man, "I gotta try that!." So he orders a huge beer, chugs it, goes over to the window, jumps out, and splats on the sidewalk below. The bartender looks over to the first man and says: "Superman, you're a real jerk when you're drunk."
Vote: has 69.34 % from 54 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: alcohol, bar, beer, celebrity, drunk
Brett Favre can throw a football over 50 yards. Chuck Norris can throw Brett Favre even further.
Vote: has 69.19 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, football, celebrity
Why does Rick Ross rap about cars when he cant fit in them.
Vote: has 69.05 % from 6 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, celebrity, music