The best Chuck Norris jokes

Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
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Once while having s*x in a tractor-trailer, part of Chuck Norris' sperm escaped and ran into the engine. We now know this truck....as Optimus Prime.
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Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.
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Chuck Norris can actually punch you in the soul.
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Chuck Norris never actually moves. He merely rotates the earth with his feet.
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Chuck Norris beat Super Mario Galaxie 2 in the big dipper... before Nintendo was invented.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a theme song because, you won't hear anything once your roundhouse kicked in the face.
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The only mark ever made on Chuck Norris is his birth mark.
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When Chuck Norris walks into a room, the mice jump on chairs.
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When Chuck Norris first saw Dragon Ball Z he thought it was a series of easy workout videos.
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