Chuck Norris once toboggoned down Mount Everest and then sprinted back up cuz he realized he lost his mitten.
The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
Angelina Jolie can curve a bullet. Chuck Norris can curve a laser.
Chuck Norris shaves with a hunting knife. "Shaving" consists of cutting a new mouth-hole every morning. That's how tough his beard is.
Chuck Norris doesn't m*sturbate, he r*pes his hand.
Chuck Norris once beat the sun at a staring contest.
Chuck Norris can get a Black-Jack with one card.
The universe expands because the stars believe this way will be safer from Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris CAN leave Hotel California.