Chuck Norris doesn't wear sunscreen, the sun wears Chuck Norris-screen.
Chuck Norris once strangled a man with the mans own eyelash.
The secret ingredient in the KFC recipe is Chuck Norris' approval.
The hardest known subsatance in the universe is Chuck Norris's will.
Chuck Norris doesn't wear flowers in his hair when he goes to San Francisco, he wears poison ivy.
Chuck Norris does not skip stones... he skips sheets of drywall.
Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.
The reason we are human is because Chuck roundhouse kicked a monkey into a higher species.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
Chuck Norris has a daugter: Jason Bourne.