Chuck Norris eats beef jerky and craps gunpowder. Then, he uses that gunpowder to make a bullet, which he uses to kill a cow and make more beef jerky. Some people refer to this as the "Circle of Life."
If Chuck Norris is defusing a bomb and has a choice of red wire, yellow wire and green wire, he chooses blue.
Chuck Norris became a firefighter, after hearing of his decision fire ceased to be an element.
Chuck Norris does not need pressure cookers. The food cooks itself out of pressure.
Atlas doesn't drop the earth because he knows Chuck Norris lives in it.
Chuck doesn't have e-mail, he has HE-mail.
Chuck Norris can play PS3 games - on PS1
Darth Vader wears a Chuck Norris mask for Halloween.
Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
Chuck Norris won American Idol, only using sign language.