The best Chuck Norris jokes

If Chuck Norris is after you, don't bother killing yourself, he'll pull you down from heaven and kill you again.
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There is no 'ctrl' button on Chuck Norris's computer. Chuck Norris is always in control.
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Chuck Norris can find a hay in a needle stack.
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Facebook hides it's privacy from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris had a staring contest with a picture. And Won.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have to face the consequences, the consequences have to face Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can't fly, gravity just looks the other way when he leaves the ground.
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Chuck Norris called McDonald's through the television.
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Chuck Norris has never won a single fight. Winning would imply some sort of competition or chance that he could loose.
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It takes courage to say YES at the altar. It takes even more courage to say NO to Chuck Norris.
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