The best Chuck Norris jokes

The results of a recent Harris Poll on "what's scarier" forced the Discovery channel to cancel Shark week in lieu of Chuck Norris week.
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The Godfather once came to Chuck Norris and asked for a favor.
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When Chuck Norris has your back you aren't likely to get it back again.
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If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.
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Most tough men eat nails for breakfast. Chuck Norris does all of his grocery shopping at Home Depot.
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Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
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A Klondike bar would do anything for a Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
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Chuck Norris can stick his hand inside a rabbit's mouth and pull out a HAT!
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Everytime a star explodes, it's because one of Chuck Norris's victims just landed there after being round-house kicked.
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