Chuck Norris only works out once a year... that's about all the gym equipment can take.
Chuck Noris can make grapes from wine.
Santa leaves out cookies for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris favorite pick up line: ''now''
Chuck Norris was once bitten by a venomous cobra .... After 5 days of excrutiating pain the cobra Eventually died
Chuck Norris lost his virginity before his dad did.
Few people can go down Niagra Falls in a barrel. Chuck Norris can go up Niagra Falls in a carboard box.
Chuck Norris can make you laugh at your own funeral.
When Chuck Norris was in middle school, his English teacher assigned an essay: "What is courage?" He received an A+ for turning in a blank page with only his name at the top.
In fine print on the last page of the Guinness Book of World Records it notes that all world records are held by Chuck Norris, and those listed in the book are simply the closest anyone else has ever gotten.