When Chuck Norris opens a bag of Doritos, it's fucking full!
Chuck Norris won gold for sitting in the crowd at the olympics.
Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, but even Jack couldn't avoid Chuck Norris' round house kick.
Chuck Norris can travel a negative distance.
Chuck Norris died 20 years ago, Death just hasn't built up the courage to tell him yet.
Chuck Norris does not teabag the ladies. He potato-sacks them.
Chuck Norris is the only person who can kick someone in the back of the face.
The square root of Chuck Norris is pain. Do not try to square Chuck Norris, the result is death.
The Great Wall of China was originally created to keep Chuck Norris out. It failed miserably.
Chuck Norris only mast*rbates to pictures of Chuck Norris.