People have near-death experiences. Death has Near-Chuck-Norris experiences.
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Chuck Norris once caught AIDS... but then he let it go.
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Chuck Norris knows no fear but fear has been known to hide from Chuck Norris.
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Did you ever wonder how the moon got craters?
3 words: Chuck Norris Golf.
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Michael Jordan is the greatest basketball player of all-time because Chuck Norris never played.
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If Chuck Norris was on Minute to Win it, they would need 59 seconds of filler.
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When Chuck Norris was born, he cut his own umbilical cord.
He then used it to strangle the doctor who slapped him on the but.
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When Columbus discovered America, Chuck Norris has already worked there as Texas ranger.
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When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet.
Water gets Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris isn't a good shot, his bullets just know better than to miss.
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