The best Chuck Norris jokes

When Chuck Norris finds fools' gold it automatically turns into real gold. Chuck Norris is nobody's fool.
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Chuck Norris was born in a log cabin... that he built with his bare hands.
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Chuck Norris put his phone on air-plane mode and flew it.
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Chuck Norris is so fast, he can run around the world and punch himself in the back of the head.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex? Because he never fucks up.
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If you stab Chuck Norris, your knife will bleed.
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If you have five dollars and Chuck Norris has five dollars, Chuck Norris has more money than you.
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Chuck Norris dropped the apple on Isaac Newtons Head.
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Some people break the laws of the state, Chuck Norris breaks the laws of physics.
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Chuck Norris can play the saxophone... while holding his breath.
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