The best Chuck Norris jokes

Chuck Norris' cowboy boots are made of real cowboys.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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Karma believes in Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris cannot only accelerate beyond the speed of light. He can also accelerate beyond the speed of dark.
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Chuck Norris has never taken a test, because no one questions Chuck Norris.
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Uri Geller bends spoons with his mind, Chuck Norris bends minds with a spoon.
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Gravity obeys Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris made Stevie Wonder flinch.
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Chuck Norris doesn't need a License to drive a car... The car needs a special license to be driven by Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris once broke the sound barrier. In half.
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