According to CNN, Chuck Norris was commanding the SEAL team in Afghanistan. When Osama found that out, he shot himself in the head.
Chuck Norris doesn't have an attitude. He has a personality you can't handle.
Mortal Kombat is not difficult enough for Chuck Norris, so he got Immortal Kombat.
Chuck Norris doesn't need a stapler, he puts the paper between his fingers and they just stick.
Chuck Norris has heard the actual voice of Charlie Brown's teacher...
Chuck Norris reads with his eyes closed.
The truth hurts dosen't it, Chuck Norris' truth kills.
Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
All wars stopped when Chuck Norris said, "Can I apply for the army?"
Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."