In reality, only Chuck Norris is allowed to sing "We are the Champions". He has no time for losers. He will rock you.
Chuck Norris can hear the sound of one hand clapping.
Chuck Norris is never late... time is just early.
When Chuck Norris got stung by a bee, the Bee had an allergic reaction called Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not play computer games, he makes games play computer!
Chuck Norris is not 70 years old. At age 60, he began getting younger. This is why he is actually only 50.
Thundergun shot is a Chuck Norris sneeze.
Q: Why are there prairies? A: Because Chuck Norris scared the trees away.
Once, Chuck Norris told Nike to "just do it..." and it did.
Chuck Norris got elected for president, even though he didn't run for anything.