The best computer jokes

Hide all of the desktop icons on someone's computer and replace the monitor's wallpaper with a screen-shot of their desktop.
Vote: has 83.29 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: April fools, computer, IT
Chuck Norris can delete the Recycling Bin.
Vote: has 83.15 % from 193 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, computer
I was in a job interview today when the manager handed me his laptop and said, "I want you to try and sell this to me." So I put it under my arm, walked out of the building and went home. Eventually he called my mobile and said, "Bring it back here right now!" I said, "£100 and it's yours."
Vote: has 83.09 % from 165 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: money, work, phone, computer
Programmer. A person who fixed a problem that you don't know you have, in a way you don't understand.
Vote: has 82.72 % from 23 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: programmer, computer, coding, geek, IT
A Help desk guy speaking to a lady user... Help desk: Double click on "My Computer". Lady: I can't see your computer... Help desk: No... click on "My Computer" on your computer. Lady: How the hell can I click on your computer from my computer?! Help desk: There is an icon labelled "My Computer" on your computer... double click on it... Lady: What the hell is your computer doing on my computer?
Vote: has 82.51 % from 77 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, computer, customer service
If at first you don't succeed, call it version 1.0.
Vote: has 81.25 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, coding, computer
One day, a Mechanical Engineer, Electrical Engineer, Chemical Engineer and Computer Engineer were driving down the street in the same car. All of a sudden, the car broke down. The Mechanical Engineer said, "I think a rod broke." The Chemical Engineer said, "The way it sputtered at the end, I don't think it's getting gas." The Electrical Engineer said, "I think there was a spark and something is wrong with the electrical system." All three turned to the computer engineer and said, "What do you think?" The Computer Engineer said, "I think we should all get out and get back in."
Vote: has 81.23 % from 51 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, science, car, computer
Jesus and the devil were arguing over which one of them was the better computer programmer. "I am!" Jesus shouted. "No, I am!" the devil countered. "I am!" "I am!" "Me!" "No, me!" "EEEEEEENOUGH!" God bellowed, and the whole universe disappeared into darkness. When the lights came back on, two computers were sitting in front of them. God said "Now, whoever makes the best computer program in twenty minutes wins." Jesus and the devil both sat down, typing and clicking furiously. This went on for about 15 minutes, but then there was a power failure, and everything went dark. When everything came back up again, the computer screens were both blank. The devil tried in vain to get back everything he had lost. He came up empty-handed. Jesus pressed one key and it all came back. The devil looked at him in astonishment. "No way! How did you do that?!" Jesus turned to him and smiled, and said "Everybody knows Jesus saves."
Vote: has 81.19 % from 91 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: life, computer, programmer, god
Funny facts about Google users: 50% of people use Google well as a search engine. The rest 50% of them use it to check if their internet is connected
Vote: has 81.05 % from 549 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: IT, technology, computer
Q: How do you know if a Chinese tried to rob your house? A: You get home and your maths homework is done, your computer is upgraded, and two hours later He is still trying to back out of your driveway.
Vote: has 80.89 % from 1255 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, math, computer