The best dirty jokes

Q: When does a pedophile go to sleep? A: When the big hand touches the small one.
Vote: has 44.13 % from 21 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, dirty, kids, sex
A New Zealander walking along the road with a sheep under each arm. He meets another New Zealander who says "you sheerin' mate?" and the first guy replies "naw, they're all mine"
Vote: has 43.43 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, animal
A man was fishing and he caught a crocodile. The crocodile told him, "Please let me go. I'll grant you any wish you desire." The man said, "Okay. I wish my balls could touch the ground." So the crocodile bit his legs off.
Vote: has 43.42 % from 43 votes. Send joke:

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Q: What’s the difference between a Catholic priest and a zit? A: At least a zit waits until you’re a teenager before it cums on your face!
Vote: has 42.92 % from 62 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, catholic, priest, teen
Q: What book do women like the most? A: "Their husbands checkbook!"
Vote: has 42.40 % from 46 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, women, husband
Yo mama so fat when she uses a space shuttle as a vibrator.
Vote: has 42.25 % from 16 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Yo mama, fat, insulting, dirty
What did the leper say to the prostitute? Keep the tip.
Vote: has 42.03 % from 18 votes. Send joke:

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What said Adam to Eva at they’re first rendezvous? Get back! I have no idea how big it grows!
Vote: has 41.94 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

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Q: Why shouldn't girls wear skirts in winter? A: Because their lips will get chapped!
Vote: has 41.84 % from 22 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, winter, women, beauty
Nothing spreads easier than butter, except for yo mommas legs.
Vote: has 41.52 % from 49 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty