The best dog jokes

Pet Owner: "Every time a bell rings, my dog goes and sits in the corner." Vet: "That's perfectly normal; he's a boxer."
Vote: has 40.95 % from 7 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog
What do you buy a dead baby for its birthday? A dead puppy!
Vote: has 40.53 % from 33 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black humor, dead baby, birthday, dog, morbid
Why do police dogs lick their balls? To get the taste of Nigger out their mouths.
Vote: has 39.91 % from 73 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: racist, cop, animal, dog
In a park people come across a man playing chess against a dog. They were astonished and said: "What a clever dog!" But the man protested and replied: "No, no, he isn't that clever. I'm leading by three games to one!"
Vote: has 35.23 % from 10 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sport, dog, game
Q: What do you call a chilly dog sitting on bunny? A: A Cold dog on a bun.
Vote: has 34.78 % from 6 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, dog
I had a knock at my door earlier, it was a policeman… “Mr Cook?” “Yes,” I replied. “I’m afraid your dog has just been reported to have chased someone on a bike.” I said, “That’s bullshit – my dog doesn’t have a bike!”
Vote: has 32.54 % from 13 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cop, dog
What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A.A dog is always happy to see you B.A dog only takes a couple of months to train.
Vote: has 31.56 % from 11 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, husband, dog, animal
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
Vote: has 30.41 % from 9 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: men, women, marriage, dog, car
What do you call a cow with no legs? Ground beef. What do you call a dog with no legs? You don't because it won't come.
Vote: has 29.98 % from 27 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, food, dog
Bears do not eat bears. Tigers do not eat tigers. Dogs do not eat dogs. Cats stopped eating kebabs.
Vote: has 28.61 % from 12 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, cat, dog, food