Q: Why are Germans bad cooks?
A: The only good one killed himself.
Why did the potato cross the road?
He saw a fork up ahead.
Yo' Mama is so nasty, she uses bacon as bandages.
Me driving by a Taco Bell.
Sign: Now Hiring Managers.
Two weeks later:
Sign: Now Hiring Managers. Background Checks Required.
Vote:
After browsing the restaurant menu, I had a question for the waitress.
"About the salmon entrée, is that a steak or a fillet?"
"Neither," she said. "It's a fish."
Vote:
What do you say to an angry 300-pound baked potato?
Anything, just butter him up.
Q: What do you call a cow playing with its self?
A: Beef stroganoff.
A couple placed an ad: "Have 4 sons, need advice on how to get a daughter."
Responses:
American: "Keep trying!"
Briton: "Change Doctor!"
Aussie: "Follow a special diet."
Indian: "Practice yoga!"
Pinoy: "Let me try!"
Q: What's the hardest part about eating a vegetable?
A: Getting her out of the wheelchair.
Vote:
Rabbit: "Are you sure this bottle of special carrot juice will cure me?"
Doctor: "Absolutely. No rabbit ever came back for another."